10 Simple Ways To Connect With Your Child – Week 10

Well here we are at week 10 of my “ways to connect with your child” series. Thank you for reading along each week. Thank you for sharing and connecting with me through your comments here on the blog, on Pinterest and of course on Facebook. It has been such an amazing journey to hear your stories and share your experiences. I’m so proud of the wonderful community we have built together. Before we get to this week’s intention, I want to share a couple of things with you. In just over a week, myself and a group of wonderful bloggers will be launching something very special, something I am very proud and excited to be a part of – I can’t wait to share it with you so stay tuned. I will also be writing a new series in the near future, focusing on motherhood, family, gratitude, finding joy in the simple moments and beauty in the seemingly mundane.I hope you will join me for that. So now, to this week’s intention.

WEEK 10 – Be a kind to yourself. You are enough.

This week’s intention is a little different. This week, let’s focus on ourselves. Let’s remember that what our children want, is us. Just us. Our time, our attention, our love. Not perfection. They just want to know they matter to us. Let’s stop putting so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect. Sure, the dishes are piled up, the carpet is overdue for a vacuum and there are toys all over the living room floor, and if the neighbors dropped over right now you’d rather pretend you’re not at home than open the door and let them see the mess, but….did you hug our kids today? Did you look them in the eyes and tell them you love them? Did you listen to them, were you their greatest champion, did you let them be themselves today? I have found time and again that whenever R and I are having a bad day, when the battles begin and we are anything but connected, I only have to look inwards. When I take a moment to think about what is bothering me, what has been causing me stress, I realise that the frustrations, the short tempers and the unresponsiveness can all be avoided if I just slow down and relax. That is my fast track to connectedness with my son. Just giving myself a break. It’s that simple. Allowing less than perfect to be enough. When I do that,  everything falls into place. So, be kind to yourself. Remember that you are enough. You are already perfect in your child’s eyes. Let them know that they are perfect in yours.

Here are some of my favorite posts from some amazing blogger about being enough. I hope you enjoy them. You will also find more inspirational posts on my Parenting Board on Pinterest.

Hands Free Mama – Take The Pressure Off
April Perry at The Power of Moms - Your Children Want You
Carrots Are Orange – Mom Bloggers Aren’t Perfect
Carrots Are Orange – Exactly Where I Should Be
Childhood101 – It was all so simple then
Childhood101 - A Reminder for a Generation
Boy Mama Teach Mama – One of Those Days
Triple T Mum – Are you enough? Yes you are!
Mummy Musings and Mayhem – Sometimes I wonder…
Toddler Approved – Super Mom Debunked
All Done Monkey - In an Alternate World
Royal Baloo - The Reality

If you are joining us for the first time ~ welcome! Below you will find the links for week 1 through 9. Each week for the last 10 weeks, I have share one simple idea that you can implement to foster a more connected relationship with your child. It is my hope that by the end of the ten weeks we have become more present for our children, and more mindful of the type of parent we want to be. With each idea being so simple, and with only one intention to focus on each week, I know we can do this. If this is the first time you are reading this series , you can still go back through all of the previous posts and read through them at your own pace. Please share your experiences in the comments. I would love to hear from you.

Here are the links for the earlier posts in the series
Week 1See them.
Week 2Listen.
Week 3Say yes.
Week 4Begin each day with play.
Week 5Come from a place of love.
Week 6Believe in them.
Week 7Let them be themselves.
Week 8Switch off, tune in.
Week 9Be a real person. Share yourself.

If this is your first time visiting One Perfect Day – welcome! If you like what you have found, please join us on our Facebook page. We are always sharing new ideas to play, learn, create and explore.

 

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10 Simple Ways To Connect With Your Child – Week 9

WEEK 9 – Be a real person. Share yourself.

Be accessible. Tell your children a story about yourself from when you were their age. Let the know what you enjoyed, what you wanted to be, how you spent your time, your friends, your school, your teachers, anything. Children love to hear stories from when their parents were growing up.

Be real. Admit your failings. Sometimes it can feel as though we shouldn’t let our guard down, that we should set a shining example for our kids. But if we never show them the whole picture, mistakes and all, how can they learn? You do not have to be perfect. What better way to connect with our kids than to show them that we are human too. If we lose our patience, or snap or yell, just say sorry. Come clean. Tell them “I made a mistake and I’m sorry. I’ll try harder.” 

If you are joining us for the first time ~ welcome! At the end of this post you will find the links for week 1 through 7. Each week for ten weeks, I’ll be sharing one simple idea that you can implement today to foster a more connected relationship with your child. It is my hope that by the end of the ten weeks we will be more present for our children, and more mindful of the type of parent we want to be. With each idea being so simple, and with only one intention to focus on each week, I know we can do this. Will you join me?

Here are the links for all 10 weeks of this series.
Week 1See them.
Week 2Listen.
Week 3Say yes.
Week 4Begin each day with play.
Week 5Come from a place of love.
Week 6Believe in them.
Week 7Let them be themselves.
Week 8Switch off, tune in.
Week 9Be a real person. Share yourself.
Week 10Be kind to yourself. You are enough.

If this is your first time visiting One Perfect Day – welcome! If you like what you have found, please join us on our Facebook page. We are always sharing new ideas to play, learn, create and explore.

 

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10 Simple Ways To Connect With Your Child – Week 8

WEEK 8 – Switch off, tune in.

This is not the post I had intended to share this week. I had a completely different idea in mind for this post but then yesterday, things changed. Several months ago I decided to have a self imposed rule that I would not switch on the lap top at all during the day. That had been working really well. I was focusing on R during the day, not the screen.  Then I bought a smart phone. Suddenly I was always connected. Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, 3 different email accounts, texts, maintaining this blog, all of it right there, all of the time. I know you know exactly what I mean. It is a constant struggle for me to just put the phone down. Sometimes I have to put it on silent and hide it in a cupboard in another room just to stop myself from responding to the constant stream of notifications and emails. Yesterday, I showed no such will power. I don’t think the phone left my side the entire day. The endless notifications had my constant attention and R was coming second every time. It wasn’t until we were sitting at the dining table, playing a board game together and I heard the words “Come ON Mummy!” that I was finally jolted out of my smart phone hypnosis. As I snapped out of it, I realised that R had said those words to me three times before I registered what was going on. Never again. I need to refocus. I need to stop sending R the message that he comes second to a “device”.

I need to switch off and tune in.

I need to disconnect, in order to reconnect.

Do you need motivation to switch off and tune in? I’ll never forget the first time I came across Hands Free Mama and read Rachel’s powerful post How To Miss a Childhood. I already knew I was too distracted but it was when I read that post that I finally made a commitment to myself (and to R) to do something about it. These are the posts that I’m going to read again this week to refocus on being present.

  • I Have a Disease  I think I need to print out the “cure for the disease” section of this post and pin it to my fridge door. That will be all the motivation I need to put the phone down.
  • The Children Have Spoken – because our children DO notice what’s going on.
  • A Well Loved Child – to remind myself that these opportunities for connection won’t last forever. I need to grasp them now.

If you are joining us for the first time ~ welcome! At the end of this post you will find the links for week 1 through 7. Each week for ten weeks, I’ll be sharing one simple idea that you can implement today to foster a more connected relationship with your child. It is my hope that by the end of the ten weeks we will be more present for our children, and more mindful of the type of parent we want to be. With each idea being so simple, and with only one intention to focus on each week, I know we can do this. Will you join me?

Here are the links for all 10 weeks of this series.
Week 1See them.
Week 2Listen.
Week 3Say yes.
Week 4Begin each day with play.
Week 5Come from a place of love.
Week 6Believe in them.
Week 7Let them be themselves.
Week 8Switch off, tune in.
Week 9Be a real person. Share yourself.
Week 10Be kind to yourself. You are enough.

If this is your first time visiting One Perfect Day – welcome! If you like what you have found, please join us on our Facebook page. We are always sharing new ideas to play, learn, create and explore.

 

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10 Simple Ways to Connect With Your Child – Week 7

WEEK 7 – Let them be themselves.

“Do not ask that your kids live up to your expectations. Let your kids be who they are, and your expectations will be in breathless pursuit.”

~ Robert Brault ~

I first came across this quote on one of my favourite blogs, Picklebums. It really struck a chord with me. It’s so easy to burden our children with our expectations. Expectations that they will excel at sports, or shine at school, or that they will be perfectly behaved, pursue a particular career or even have the same interests as ourselves. If we could, just for a moment, put aside all our preconceived ideas of who we want our children to become, we might just see what amazing and beautiful individuals they already are. Let them be themselves. Let them shine. Let them pursue their own passions, even if they are not your own. In a way, this is a practise of letting go in order to connect. Accept them for who they are.  There really is no greater gift you could give your child.

If you are joining us for the first time ~ welcome! At the end of this post you will find the links for week 1 through 5. Each week for the next ten weeks, I’ll be sharing one simple idea that you can implement today to foster a more connected relationship with your child. It is my hope that by the end of the ten weeks we will be more present for our children, and more mindful of the type of parent we want to be. With each idea being so simple, and with only one intention to focus on each week, I know we can do this. Will you join me?

Here are the links for all 10 weeks of this series.
Week 1See them.
Week 2Listen.
Week 3Say yes.
Week 4Begin each day with play.
Week 5Come from a place of love.
Week 6Believe in them.
Week 7Let them be themselves.
Week 8Switch off, tune in.
Week 9Be a real person. Share yourself.
Week 10Be kind to yourself. You are enough.

If this is your first time visiting One Perfect Day – welcome! If you like what you have found, please join us on our Facebook page. We are always sharing new ideas to play, learn, create and explore.

 

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10 Simple Ways to Connect With Your Child – Week 6


WEEK 6 – Believe in them.

“The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice.”

~ Peggy O’Mara, Mothering.Com~

Think about that for a moment. The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice. What kind of inner voice will you give to your children?

 Be a voice of strength, resilience, self-worth and love. Let them know that they are unique and that fact alone makes them wonderful and precious. Be a voice that tells them they can do anything, go anywhere, be amazing. Be a voice that tells them they are special and that thy have something wonderful to offer the world. Be a voice that tells them they are safe and they are loved.

 If you are joining us for the first time ~ welcome! At the end of this post you will find the links for week 1 through 5. Each week for the next ten weeks, I’ll be sharing one simple idea that you can implement today to foster a more connected relationship with your child. It is my hope that by the end of the ten weeks we will be more present for our children, and more mindful of the type of parent we want to be. With each idea being so simple, and with only one intention to focus on each week, I know we can do this. Will you join me?

Here are the links for all 10 weeks of this series.
Week 1See them.
Week 2Listen.
Week 3Say yes.
Week 4Begin each day with play.
Week 5Come from a place of love.
Week 6Believe in them.
Week 7Let them be themselves.
Week 8Switch off, tune in.
Week 9Be a real person. Share yourself.
Week 10Be kind to yourself. You are enough.

If this is your first time visiting One Perfect Day – welcome! If you like what you have found, please join us on our Facebook page. We are always sharing new ideas to play, learn, create and explore.

 

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10 Simple Ways to Connect With Your Child ~ Week 5

WEEK 5 – Come from a place of love.

Love me when I least deserve it, because that is when I need it most.

~Swedish Proverb~

See the world through your child’s eyes. When they are defiant. When they will not listen. When you’ve tried every gentle parenting technique you know and they still struggle against you. When you’ve heard “No I won’t!” for the hundredth time that day and there’s nothing left in you but desperation and frustration ~ stop, breathe. Know that they are simply trying to communicate something ~ a need.

That need is you.

When R is going through a phase of not listening, of refusing to co-operate, of saying no, it is usually one of two causes – he’s feeling anxious because he can see that I’m feeling stressed about something or he hasn’t had enough one on one time with me. This week I will be working on remembering this instead of reacting with frustration. Instead of snapping and raising my voice, I’ll remember that he needs me to slow down and relax. He needs me to be fully present for him. He needs to see me calm and relaxed in order to feel calm and relaxed himself.

 If you are joining us for the first time ~ welcome! At the end of this post you will find the links for week 1 through 4. Each week for the next ten weeks, I’ll be sharing one simple idea that you can implement today to foster a more connected relationship with your child. It is my hope that by the end of the ten weeks we will be more present for our children, and more mindful of the type of parent we want to be. With each idea being so simple, and with only one intention to focus on each week, I know we can do this. Will you join me?

If this is your first time visiting One Perfect Day – welcome! If you like what you have found, please join us on our Facebook page. We are always sharing new ideas to play, learn, create and explore.

 Here are the links for all 10 weeks of this series.
Week 1See them.
Week 2Listen.
Week 3Say yes.
Week 4Begin each day with play.
Week 5Come from a place of love.
Week 6Believe in them.
Week 7Let them be themselves.
Week 8Switch off, tune in.
Week 9Be a real person. Share yourself.
Week 10Be kind to yourself. You are enough.


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10 Simple Ways to Connect with your Child – Week 4


Welcome to Week 4 of the series! I’ve been wondering if it might suit everyone better if I posted these on a Monday instead? Would it make more sense to begin a new intention at the start of the week? Let me know and I’ll happily change the day. OK, so here’s what I’ll be working on this week.

Continue reading

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10 simple ways to connect with your child ~ Week 2


Welcome to the second week in our series ~  10 simple things you can do today to connect with your child. I’ve been overwhelmed by your response to last week’s post. Thank you to everyone who left a comment here on the blog, joined me on Facebook or shared this on Pinterest. I’m so excited that we’re doing this together!

If you are joining us for the first time, you can read the post for WEEK 1 here, but don’t worry if you missed week 1. You can start right now with week 2. Each week for the next ten weeks, I’ll be sharing one simple idea that you can implement today to foster a more connected relationship with your child. It is my hope that by the end of the ten weeks we will be more present for our children, and more mindful of the type of parent we want to be. With each idea being so simple, and with only one intention to focus on each week, I know we can do this. Will you join me?

WEEK 2 – LISTEN

Listen earnestly to anything your children want to tell you, no matter what. 
If you don’t listen eagerly to the little stuff when they are little, 
then they won’t tell you the big stuff when they are big,
because to them, all of it has always been big stuff. 
~Catherine M. Wallace~

This quote from Catherine M. Wallace stopped me in my tracks the first time I read it. It’s certainly something I need to work on. More and more I’m noticing that I hear my son, R (3), but I’m not actively listening to him. I’ve become a master at interjecting with “Oh, really” and “that’s great honey” at just the right moment in a conversation, but my mind is so full of “stuff” lately ~ you know, all those really exciting things like deciding what to cook for dinner tonight, putting another load of washing in the machine, realising that DVD rental was due back at the store three days ago ~ that it’s not until R has finished talking that I realise I haven’t actually heard a single word he’s said. This has really caught me by surprise. I never used to be so distracted. If I don’t work on this now, eventually he’ll simply stop sharing with me. I want him to feel heard and valued.  I want him to know that he can always come to me and I’ll listen intently. Last week’s intention of making eye contact and smiling has really helped. It has ensured I’m present for him before he even begins to speak to me.

This week’s intention then, is to listen. Attentively.

 Let’s be mindful to show our children that we are genuinely interested in what they have to say. Let’s put aside distractions and truly hear our children.  Ask questions and then truly listen to the answers. This is how we can come to know who our children really are, what matters to them, and what they truly need from us. This is how we can encourage them to want to keep sharing with us as they grow older.

Below are some links to articles that I’ve found helpful in learning to becoming a better listener. You’ll also find lots more links on my Pinterest boardInspiring blog posts and parenting inspiration“.

How will you make time to listen to your child? Let’s share our ideas in the comments.

 

Here are the links for all 10 weeks of this series.
Week 1See them.
Week 2Listen.
Week 3Say yes.
Week 4Begin each day with play.
Week 5Come from a place of love.
Week 6Believe in them.
Week 7Let them be themselves.
Week 8Switch off, tune in.
Week 9Be a real person. Share yourself.
Week 10Be kind to yourself. You are enough.

If this is your first time visiting One Perfect Day – welcome! If you like what you have found, please join us on our Facebook page. We are always sharing new ideas to play, learn, create and explore.

 

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10 simple ways to connect with your child ~ Week 1

I’m excited to be sharing with you the first post in a new series on the blog. 10 simple things you can do TODAY to connect with your child. Each week for the next ten weeks, I’ll be sharing one simple idea that you can implement right now, to foster a more connected relationship with your child. Each weekly post will take less than 5 minutes to read and the ideas shared will be simple enough to achieve on even the busiest of days. It is my hope that by the end of the ten weeks we will be more present for our children, and more mindful of the type of parent we want to be and that we know our children deserve. With each idea being so simple, and with only one intention to focus on each week, I know we can do this.  Will you join me?

WEEK 1 – SEE THEM

When your child enters the room, look up from what you are doing, look them in the eyes and smile.

It seems like such a simple thing to do but its impact can be huge. Acknowledge your child. Notice them. Do this every single time you see them throughout the day, even if you were speaking with them just minutes earlier. When they enter the room, look up. Look them in the eyes. Smile.

That’s it for week 1. Simple right? Will you join me on this 10 week journey? Please leave a comment and let me know. I’d love to hear how this week’s intention unfolds for you. Please feel free to grab our “10 Simple Ways to Connect With Your Child” button from the sidebar as well!


You can view WEEK 2 here

Here are the links for the entire series.
Week 1See them.
Week 2Listen.
Week 3Say yes.
Week 4Begin each day with play.
Week 5Come from a place of love.
Week 6Believe in them.
Week 7Let them be themselves.
Week 8Switch off, tune in.
Week 9Be a real person. Share yourself.
Week 10Be kind to yourself. You are enough.

If this is your first time visiting One Perfect Day – welcome! If you like what you have found, please join us on our Facebook page. We are always sharing new ideas to play, learn, create and explore.

 

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